Why Women Carry Purses

While arriving at an upscale wedding, my husband said, “Why do you need your purse? Just leave it in the trunk.”

I looked at him incredulously. It had the same effect as expecting a soldier to report for active duty wearing beachwear. Men just don’t get it when a woman feels the need to be prepared.

For those who don’t understand why women heave around ten-pound shoulder bags, I present you with the following perfectly logical reasons.

First, sneak a peek inside a woman’s purse. Everything is there for a reason. You’ll find the obvious, like a wallet and credit cards and personal identification. But to your amazement, you’ll find much more.

I repeat: everything is there for a reason.

You probably will find ChapStick, hand lotion, and tissues, all necessary maintenance equipment for the busy woman. If she has long hair, you will find spare bobby pins and clips and hair spray. She never knows when that gossiping neighbor will arrive at the store just when she arrives unprepared, looking like a hurricane survivor.

You will find pens and pencils and a pad of paper for grocery lists—and for copying down the insurance information of the car she just backed into at the grocery store. This may differ a little if the woman is a Generation X-er or a Millennial. In that case she stores written information on her phone. But I digress.

Those are only the things in one inside pocket. Going to the next pocket you’ll find an address book, sunglasses, and gum and mints. (Proof in the pudding: we were at a funeral and my son asked me for breath mints. We all were glad I gave him gum; it lasted longer.)

In the zippered compartment you’ll find dental floss and hand sanitizer (don’t try to tell me you haven’t borrowed her hand sanitizer), a nail file and nail clippers. That’s because she usually chips a fingernail putting store bags in the trunk or backseat. Double bingo if she has small children.

You may also find headache medicine, a checkbook, a hand mirror (nothing more embarrassing than cottage cheese between the front teeth) and a set of keys. Some even carry a travel-size toothbrush. Of course, she wouldn’t be complete without a cell phone.

Now that you’ve been enlightened, do you really think women can be prepared for any occasion with things we stuff in our nonexistent pockets?

Just try telling your wife or girlfriend to leave her purse home sometime—but don’t be surprised if she looks at you as though you have a third eyeball sprouting out your forehead. In that case, offer to carry her ten pounds of supplies in your pockets.

Okay men, it's your turn. Have you ever benefitted from your wife carrying ten pounds of survival supplies in her purse? You can comment below.