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Stuck in a Power Outage

Ask your friends in the South how they liked having snow and ice this winter. You probably will get a mixed reaction. Children were ecstatic when fluffy white flakes fell from the sky. Adults perhaps grudgingly dug out heavy clothing and snow shovels if they had any.

Those in the North usually know how to prepare for power outages. In case you are not familiar with being stuck inside a cold house for extended periods of time, I offer Dictionary for the Snowbound. It could keep you entertained while huddled under all the blankets in your house.

· Blue Darter: Little Junior dashing back inside after going to the bathroom in the backyard because “the potty smells too yucky.”

· Chocolate Brain Freeze: Fearing all the leftover Christmas candy will go bad, family members devour it before it freezes.

· Cross-Checking: Identifying the person who absentmindedly flushed the toilet and drank the last of the stored water. Stand him outside and pelt him with snowballs until he apologizes.

· Elementary Jeopardy: On count of three, see who can blurt out the name of their third-grade teacher.

· Feral Hogs: Family members playing This Little Piggy on the feet of the person huddled next to them. Usually occurs 24th hour after loss of electricity.

· Frostbite Frenzy: Clipping toenails at first sign of power outage, in anticipation of long-term hibernation. Best if accomplished before temperature in house dips to 45 degrees.

· Frozen Chicken Fingers: Thumb-wrestling matches, resulting when eyes of hibernating family members become glazed with boredom and extremities are almost numb.

· Furniture Surfing: Competition involving jumping from one piece of living room furniture to the next without touching frozen floor. Extra movement serves to warm nearly frozen body parts. (We did this when our daughter’s boyfriend was stuck at our house during a three-day power outage.)

· Heater Beater: Building a blanket fort in the living room.

· Repi-torture: Singing One Hundred Bottles of Coke on the Wall until someone has a nervous breakdown. Then roll him under the blanket fort and calm him by telling Knock-Knock jokes.

· Sausage Stuffing: What one looks like while wearing seven layers of clothing.

· Sesame Street Insanity: Talk to one another in Elmo and Cookie Monster voices until someone develops a nervous tic in their face.

· Tonsil Tantalizer: Suck on a Lifesaver® until it melts, without breaking the hole in the middle.

There you have it, activities for the whole family while trapped inside a veritable snow or ice cave. Tape this list to the handle of your snow shovel and enjoy the reprieve from work.

What about you? Any more suggestions for weathering a power outage? Don't forget to use the comment box below.


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