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How to Recover Your Memory

Did you hear about the lady who drove away from the gas pump with the nozzle still in her tank? She probably wished she had signed up for the memory course she read about—if only she could remember where.

I have had my share of forgetful moments. Once, at our local mom and pop grocery store, I forgot to pay for a case of yogurt under my cart. When I went back to pay the surprised cashier, I beamed a cheesy grin at the curious people behind me. (And no, I wasn’t the lady who drove away with the gas nozzle still in her car.)

My friend Mavis has a theory about forgetfulness. It goes something like this: As we grow older and begin to amass information, our mental capacity becomes saturated. That is the reason we can’t remember three items on our mental grocery list and where we left our car keys.

I would add another component to Mavis’s theory. Sometimes our brains become so saturated with facts that more of the same would create information overload. The best way to gain more space then, is to transfer files of information from our brains to those of our children.

I don’t mean to brag, but if the scientific community gets hold of this theory, it could revolutionize our lives.

Here’s how it works: You walk into the kitchen and say, “Junior, I just forgot why I came into this room. Come here; I need to transfer some brain files.”

Gazing into his eyes, you say, “Here’s a valuable lesson you need to know. When you get older, you’re going to grow nose hairs. They gross people out. Buy yourself an electric nose hair plucker if you want to be chairman of the board someday.”

Then you can add, “There, I feel better now. And I just remembered I was coming to take laundry out of the washer.”

See how it works? I just know my children will be happy to do their part in absorbing the priceless information I have accumulated through the years. Next thing I know they’ll be hanging on my every word.

What about you? Any advice on recovering your memory? Feel free to comment below.


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