Dictionary for the Snowbound



Yesterday's huge dumping of snow reminds me of a similar time when we lived out west. Our daughter’s boyfriend was visiting from another state when a blizzard knocked out our power. Three days ticked by while we sought ways to amuse ourselves.


Below is a dictionary for those in like circumstances. I’ve added a few entries for those with small children.


Blue Darter: Species uncannily resembling little Junior. Known to dash back to the house after relieving himself in the backyard because “the potty smells too yucky.”


Chocolate Brain Freeze: Numbed state of mind causing one to fear all the ice cream in the freezer may go bad. Occupants of house thereby devour it before it becomes gooey.


Cross-Checking: Agitation of mind caused by family member who thoughtlessly flushed the toilet and drank the last of the bottled water. Household occupants retaliate by standing him outside and pelting him with snowballs until he repents.


Feral Hogs: Advanced state of boredom, causing one to play This Little Piggy on a family member’s feet.


Frostbite Frenzy: Panic caused by fear of prolonged imprisonment in house. At first sign of power outage, victims clip toenails before temperature in house dips to 40 degrees.


Frozen Chicken Fingers: Thumb-wrestling match with person huddled next to oneself on sofa. Most effective if done before extremities become totally numb.


Furniture Surfing: Activity favored by teenagers. Consists of competition to see who can jump from one piece of living room furniture to the next without touching frigid floor.


Heater Beater: Act of conserving body heat by building blanket fort in the living room. Involve kitchen chairs and even the table, if participants feel creative.


Repi-torture: Diversion tactic whereby all sing One Hundred Bottles of Coke on the Wall until someone shows signs of nervous breakdown.


Sausage Stuffing: Appearance of household occupants stuffed into several layers of clothing for warmth.


Sesame Street Insanity: Continuously speaking to one another in Elmo and Cookie Monster voices until someone develops nervous tic in his or her face.



Tonsil Tantalizer: Daring one to suck on a Lifesaver® until it’s gone, without breaking the hole in the middle.

************

There you have it. Tape this list to the handle of your snow shovel and prepare to be entertained.


Sidebar:

You may be wondering if we did all those things while snowbound for three days. Here’s the story behind the story.


My husband was out of town on a business trip during this power outage. Otherwise his hyperactive nature would have given us many more ideas.


We did furniture surfing (I think Beth won that contest). We did have thumb wrestling matches. And we all looked like stuffed sausages, sporting our winter coats while huddled under blankets.


Fortunately, we had friends in another part of the county who still had power in their house. And since they were our landlords…and since their daughter was our daughter’s best friend… we begged/asked if we could crash at their house. They kindly allowed us the privilege, insuring hot meals and a shower in the bargain. We are thankful for friends.


What about you? Have any stories about being snowbound? We would love to hear them! Feel free to comment below.